getting new care givers
We are concerned about the impact of changing caregivers when our au pair goes home. The last time we went through a transition it took our kids weeks to adjust. What is the best way to handle it so that our entire family including our new au pair have a smooth transition?
Read our Article on the "Overlap."
Hi there - we wanted you and our readers to know that we do have an article on this issue:
What is an Overlap?
This is when your current au pair is still in your home and you have the new au pair arrive, so their time together will 'overlap' from a few days to a few weeks or so. Many host parents plan on this so their experienced au pair can 'train' the new au pair and get her settled in. This is very helpful if you are very busy and cannot take off a few days to do the orientation yourself. This can work out quite well if your present au pair is mature and understands why you are doing this.
However, we have seen even the most mature and pleasant au pairs sink into a funk once the new au pair arrives on the scene. Then, you can have trouble!
Here are our Top Five reasons not to overlap au pairs.
Top 5 Reasons NOT to Overlap Au Pairs
Reason #5: The Children
Often young children will react to the new au pair in a negative way and cling to their old au pair. As much as this may be flattering to your old au pair, the new au pair will not take kindly to it and her reactions to the children can be negative and may have lasting consequences. You want to avoid the new au pair starting off on the wrong foot. The overlap can also confuse young children. Who do they go to? Who is calling the shots? Also, your children need closure with their old au pair and saying goodbye may be hard for them with the new au pair underfoot.
To read the entire article, look it up under Let's Talk Au Pairs!
transition
Its all a series of transitions - the matching, the arriving, the settling in, the driving, the leaving, etc.
Make sure you don't do an overlap (I am against them) with the new and old au pair; make sure she has taken care of all her bills, debts, etc., take the car away a few weeks before her departure (if there is an accident, you are not going to get the deductible), and throw her a nice going away party, invite the other au pairs and the counselor and make your au pair feel appreciated (if she was).
For the new au pair, the same kinds of things that you do to welcome an au pair (there are tons of info and articles on this online and here, on this website - check FAQs). Welcome basket, kids are home for the first dinner, make her feel special, paint and refreshen up the bedroom, even if you have to buy a new quilt (we find that the au pairs are pretty hard on the covers or quilts we buy, not sure why!).
It is pretty common sense - just be a good host and make her feel welcome, my wife said "do what you would want a family to do if your daughter was coming/leavng." I guess if you follow that logic, all will go swell!
Good Luck
RE: getting new caregivers
We had our last au pair overlap for a few days with our current au pair, and it really helped. She got to shadow the old au pair, and when the old au pair left, the kids were already familiar with the new one. My kids have seemed to handle the adjustment very well. They have had new teachers at school, and coaches for sports too. I try to make sure my husband and I are around more in the early days of an au pair's arrival to help make the change go smoothly for everyone.